QUESTIONS OF THE DAY

im feeling a lil down today...well not onli today..lately..sumtng up wit me..sumthing bothering me..u noe wut is it??seriously..i dun...but i noe i wanna say sumthing abt fwens...
i noe its gonna hurt sum hus gonna read my post..but..wut the heckk...

fwens comes and go rite??

seriously i hate this line...last 2 year during this time..or maybe ealier..i met ben..he was real quiet..but soon he warm up..and he was the chatterbox in our family (yc gang)..oh my..he will bring up anything from the littlest things to the big issues...months has pass..soon..its time for him to leave home..yees...benjie tam is leaving to UK to cont on his work..
it didnt strike me dat how deep he had affected me in my life..

ytd me and the family wen out to bangsar to haf our last yc session wit ben..and on the way home..ben said sumtng so deep to me..and it hit me..

"ben is leaving..and i wont be seeing him anymore"...my ben is leaving..the guy hu cracks the lamest lines..say the stupidest words..and sumtimes has his wrong lines..but he was always der for me..up n dwn..he was der..to msg me the very nxt day and ask me if im ok..wen im sick..he is always constanly telling me to drink more water and eat my meds..
he was sumone i chud lean on wen i nid anything..he was a guy dat i chud count on..first time in my life..i haf sumone dat cares for me so deeply...a fwen dat whudnt mind if i share my burden wit

and wen he told me to stick together and we will always haf each other..i felt a shock..one piece of the puzzle is going off..
yc will never be the same anymore..wit his..

'oi bang..teh o ice limau tu dgn roti planta'..

and wit his..'dont worry b happy..lifes sarks'....

he was our ben..the familys kind..my 'i can count on you always' ben...
and hes leaving...

i wen home wit dis feeling dat im gonna lose a fwen..a fwen i can call true fwen..i wen home wit tears in eyes..i wen home wit a sad feeling

ben if ure reading this..

i will miss so deeply..from the day u n i met..i knew ure gonna be the one for us..be the guy hu take cares of things..i will not forget the times u were der for me ..guide me tru my family problems..to my heart breaks and to my fwens issues...
you were always der and will always b der...
and wen ure in UK i hope u will find ur love life u always dream of..ur own house..your cars..and most importanly ur happiness..

so ben..take care...

-buddies alwiz & alwiz buddies-

......................................................................................

tokin abt fwens..story of my life!!!..
fwens come n go..
seirously..
i had the best set of fwens..i chudnt ask for more..fwens who whud b der for me..fwens hu stood up for me..fwens i ponteng class wit..fwens i chud gossip wit..fwens i chud cry and laff wit...
but now..they seem so far away..

i use to haf dis saying..
if i haf my fwens for me..the void of love will b fill..which is true..

but wen i found him..sumone hu fill the puzzle of love..
i lost the puzzle of fwens..

i had a bestie hu told me..hu kept telling me dat..

he feels distant from me
and i told him..
'its life..fwens come n go..'

not till this day it really hit me hard...i haf live at least 4 months of 2007 without them..

in high sku..i had this bestie..will not mention his name..bestie for 5 years...but once we hit coll..he found the one..the one dat fills his heart and all..
and slowly we wen our separate ways..
fwens from my sku told me..my gang told me..

'be happy for him..he found his happiness..even though how much we hate it..we are his fwens.."

yea ok..deal wit it rite?

when they say

'fwens forever'
'i will be der for you..'

do they really mean it??no.....seriously...do they??

yea i do still haf my yc fwens ..but at times i feel dat we go yc coz its a tradition..its not coz we wanna hang out..catch up..and all..
i always haf msg like..

'eh u free..yc la..sien la..'

'hey..wanna shop??itchy hand la'..

y cant they say...

'hey how are you??how you doing?'

msg just to say hie..msg just to know how are we doing..call us just to check on us..

gel cher told me..if we dont make the move..we wont get wut we nid..if we wan ppl to smile at us..smile at them first...

and huever is reading my blog is gonna ask me..

"why dun u msg me first"

den y not u ask urself the same question???


sides dat..i haf this 'fwen i categorize'..

i think girls if ure reading this..ure gonna agree wit me wit this..

haf u ever had a guy fwen..he is onli close to u coz he wanna get u..instead of being ur close fwen..and dats not it..the worst is..wen u treat him as a good fwen..i really really good fwen..and den he found out..
he has no chance wit u at all..he will totally drop everything...seriously...he will distant himself..he will..like..ignore u..

first few months..wen u nid transpprt..he is der for u..wen u nid sumone to acc u sumwhr..he is der..wen u ind sumone to makan wit u..he is der..wen u bored and u call him..hes free..

but after dat..slowly he will be like..
'i cant sent u la..busy..'

'oh..u makan wit sumone else first..i got assign to do'..

seriously!!..how low will u get man??!!!

girls..agree wit me if u think im right..


anyways..i haf my flaws too..im nto sayin im all perfect..
im just sayin wut i feel...

all i wanna say..i miss my fwens..i miss my sku fwens..i miss my coll fwens..i miss my fwens..real fwens..
i dunno y am i feeling it now..prob coz..both the space for love n fwens is begining to get hollow..

sighh..i shall shut up now..i wanan sleep..sick..guess my theory of being ok by sat is plain bullshyt!!..sigh..shall update again later!!