ITS NEVER IN THE CARDS FOR U N MEi always wonder why is
there such people in the world that usses u wenever they need u..bitch abt things they dont like abt u even though u never do anything to them...im sick of those ppl...but how am i gonna avoid them?i go to work wit them..i see them most of the day..iuts soo fark up...i tot i chud count on thme as a fwen...but in the end..they bactstab u like ure no one..they treat u like ure dirt to them..i really feel like i dont belong...i really feel like i haf no one to fall back on...im all alone in this
stupid place...i feel like..ever since i got here..its one big down turn for me..i try to b happy..try to b strong..but sumtimes..it reaches a limit..that i just cant stand it...i wnana run away n dissapear..i really do...i wake up/...tellin myself..its gonna b a good day..smile n haf fun...i come bck..feeling shytty..smoking my way out of misery...whr did i go wrong in life..wut did i do to them that they haf to b so mean to me...una bday is coming..and she invited everyone..n i
didnt know at all..i haf to know from a collegue that i dun like...i was clueless..humilated in a way..and just..plain sick...i wanna change my day off so i wont haf the same day off as them..i do my grocerry shoppin now separated from them..coz i just cant stand them...they tell me they dun like this n dat..but yet...
their action..are plain...stupid....different...i just dun belong ere..i really dont..i wanna leave this place...i did think of stoppid work and go home..but i tell mysaelf this..ive done 3 months alrdy...wats another 3 months gonna do...well..oen side of my is telling me..
its gonna torture u like hell..one side sayingf..its gonna b all better soon..i feel like im back inprimary sku again..dmn farkin childsish........
and there was us..he told me..he wanna b wit me..buthe cant stand the gossip that will happen..but will our
fwens say abt us...but i think to myself..y must u take in consideration abt them..its abt us..u n i....y must they come in?y??i hate being like this..feeling like i ahf sumthing but yet i dont...maye its not in the cards for us to b together...never will...maybe i shud seriouslyt let go..move on...yea i shud...i wanna end this
feeling that i cant explain...
everything is not goin good..but yet
im still ere...i'll try to b strong...to keep myself goin...but sumtimes i just wan god to give me a reason..y shud i keep goin...?is this any good...y me?
i just i will never know ...
all i know..i dont belong...i dont haf no one...i just wanna dissapear