Entry title: TWO IS BETTER THAN ONE
Date / Time : Sunday, December 20, 2009 / 1:12 AM
I still wonder every minute, the words I read keeps coming back, and keeps me thinking, what does he really meant?
I still don't feel like I belong, I still don't feel like I was wanted, why? Is it because of what I know? Or maybe it's because what my heart is telling me is true? I try to deny what I know, maybe it was meant for something else, maybe it was suppose to mean something else and I am interpreting it the wrong way? But, the more deny, the more I reject myself, it keeps coming on stronger, I start to doubt I am strong enough to keep this feeling down, to suppress and hide my worries, try to keep my smiles up, try to not think about it, but when I am all alone, it starts flowing back into my head.
"What does he feels? What is he thinking? Does he feel like how I do? Does he know what how I feel? Will I ever feel like I am wanted?"
Questions keeps running back and ford, looking for answers, looking for that little comfort saying " Hey, I am still here, here for you, always"
Maybe one day, just maybe one day in the future, not too long, I will have that feeling, the feeling I have been looking for from him, maybe just one day I will, but how far long in the future? Will there be a future?
